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{"id":583,"date":"2016-10-28T05:29:37","date_gmt":"2016-10-28T05:29:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.tamaragoranson.com\/?page_id=583"},"modified":"2021-03-29T11:04:19","modified_gmt":"2021-03-29T18:04:19","slug":"the-beasts-within-excerpt","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.tamaragoranson.com\/the-beasts-within-excerpt\/","title":{"rendered":"The Beasts Within Excerpt"},"content":{"rendered":"
Sister is the first to grow restless.\u00a0 There is a trail that has been cleared of vegetation leading inland from the water.\u00a0 It is likely that the beavers have been using it for many weeks.\u00a0 We trudge along it following\u00a0 Sister and soon realize that the beavers have etched out a canal in places.\u00a0 While these waterways make it easier for the beavers, it is tough tracking through mud for the rest of us.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
My feet are soaked right through when Anja motions for us to stop.\u00a0 She is the first to notice the beavers\u2019 reddish-brown heads.\u00a0 There are two of them half-submerged in the shallow waters directly in front of us with their wet fur slicked back on their rounded heads and their beady eyes glancing from side to side.\u00a0 I take a breath and focus on listening to the stream gurgling over the rocks, on smelling the fresh, outdoor air that is vibrantly alive with the smell of springtime growth.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Anja and my sister quickly exit the water and split apart with the intention of coming at the beavers from either side of the bank and forcing them towards me where l wait with my weapon raised.\u00a0 I want this kill.\u00a0 This is the moment to show my women what I can do, to show them what a hunter of my status can achieve.\u00a0 I see the beavers slowly coming from upstream, drifting easily, their noses poking out of the shallows.\u00a0 Suddenly, I lunge, but I miss both of them.\u00a0 An instant later, I take aim again.\u00a0 I am so focused that I go completely still before I forcefully drive my spear into the water, aiming to hit the beaver bringing up the rear.\u00a0 The creature twists and splashes water with its tail, but I hold firm.\u00a0 I feel the solidness of the beaver\u2019s form underneath my vibrating spear.\u00a0 Then, I dig the weapon in with a jab and feel my spear enter the solid mass of writhing fur.\u00a0 From somewhere distant, there are shouts and screams and splashing water and the sounds of birds.\u00a0 Then the beaver stops moving.\u00a0 It is dead.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I stand there gawking until there is a a flash of pain, hot and sharp.\u00a0 Instantaneously, I whirl around.\u00a0 When I look down and see a stream of blood spewing forth from my shin, I curse again and my head jerks up to search the water.\u00a0 Just ahead, there is a\u00a0 large hairy creature with a flat tail circling me in the knee-deep water.\u00a0 The beaver is too close.\u00a0 My body tenses as I torque my neck and lift my feet from the stream\u2019s muddy bed.\u00a0 In an instant, I lose sight of the beaver as it flings up more water with its tale.\u00a0 At that moment, the pain registers, and it dawns on me that the damn thing bit me in the\u00a0 leg in retaliation for killing its brother! I\u2019m lucky that it didn\u2019t chew right through to bone.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cBe off!\u201d I yell.\u00a0 I am careful to give the beaver a wide birth as I guard its dead mate, my hunting trophy.\u00a0 The shaft of my harpoon sticks out of the water and marks the spot where the carcass is sitting in a pool of fetid water and murky mud.\u00a0 In the distance, Sister is making her way downstream, inching her way towards the kill.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cStay away!\u201d I shout.\u00a0 There is a triumphant grin on her muddy face.\u00a0 I see Anja on the opposite bank gingerly picking her way across a pile of slippery rocks.\u00a0 Suddenly she freezes and gapes at me.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cBjorn, you are bleeding!\u201d she yells.\u00a0 I look down.\u00a0 The gash looks bad. The beaver\u2019s incisors have left a nasty laceration on the back of my calf.\u00a0 The blood is gushing out and mingling with the water streaming down my leg so that the water-blood trickles down in rivulets. \"Anja, don't come here!\" I mutter as I grit my teeth and endure another bolt of red hot, searing pain.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Somehow I manage to exit the shallows while simultaneously dragging my speared beaver behind me, but the carcass weighs me down.\u00a0 Sister follows close behind.\u00a0 I hear the squish and slurp of her feet as she tries to navigate her way through the gooey mud.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Once I have reached the treeline, the anger - an anguish turned inwards - slips inside like mites nipping.\u00a0 I shouldn\u2019t have missed on my first shot!.\u00a0 The blasted thing bit into me with its sharpened teeth.\u00a0 Teeth through skin.\u00a0 Teeth on bone.\u00a0 The wound is now pulsating.\u00a0 When I look down, I see a mess of flesh and blood and mud and dirt.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cLet me see your injury,\u201d Anja says tersely as she picks her way down the bank.\u00a0 Gruffly, I hold out my hand to push her back.\u00a0 I do not need her pity.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cPick that carcass up and bring it here!\u201d I order my sister in a caustic tone.\u00a0 She is struggling to make it into shore in the slippery mud, but she turns around and heeds my call.\u00a0 It is a struggle for her to dislodge the harpoon from the beaver\u2019s fur.\u00a0 As soon as I see that she has managed, I lower myself to a patch of grass, slick with mud.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
The gash in my skin is deep and nasty. As I push the torn skin back into place, I wince, and the bile rises in my gorge.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\"Let me help,\" Anja frets as she\u00a0 takes charge.\u00a0 She tears off strips of cloth from her shift to use as a tourniquet.\u00a0 I watch her tie the fabric around my calf to stop the blood, but my world is spinning and the pain is bad.\u00a0 Her face looks grey as she uses her teeth to pull the bandage tight.\u00a0 I am barely conscious, barely able to concentrate.\u00a0 I have always known Anja to be a strong woman, and today she is everything I want and more.\u00a0 There is blood pooling on the ground.\u00a0 My blood.\u00a0 My sticky blood,\u00a0 warm and reddish black.\u00a0 My head swims.\u00a0 I see stars exploding.\u00a0 A flash of white tailing across my eyes.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
When I come to, I am lying in a clearing in the middle of the bush.\u00a0 I hear Sister\u2019s frightened voice even before I see her fuzzy face.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cSurely, you're not going to sew him up right here in the open air?\u201d she whispers to Anja in a panicked voice.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cI can't move him.\u00a0 He is too heavy, and he can't walk.\u201d Anja\u2019s words are garbled.\u00a0 From my position on the ground, I see the porcupine quill needle in her teeth, and a curse escapes my lips in a clipped, harsh tone, in a voice that is not my own.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
A crow calls somewhere overhead.\u00a0 The air is still, but there is a pungent scent of new growth that permeates the area where I am lying in the blood-soaked grass.\u00a0 I inhale deeply.\u00a0 Anja sees that I am awake, and she leans over and asks me to steady myself so that she can sew me up.\u00a0 I watch her raise the needle.\u00a0 Then I pass out again.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I'm not sure where I am when I hear the crows.\u00a0 Their screeches scratch my ears.\u00a0 Their black forms drop in thousands from the sky, and they block the sun.\u00a0 All I smell is blood and fear and death and stink.\u00a0 The beasts can have me in this state.\u00a0 I am in too much agony to fight them off.\u00a0\u00a0 By Odin\u2019s beard, if this is what it is like to die, let death claim me!\u00a0 I will happily give up entering Valhalla\u2019s gates.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Memories of Anja - my raven woman \u2013 surface.\u00a0 Let me have the memories.\u00a0 I'll take them into the next life where I imagine that the hunting is plentiful and where there are no beavers lurking hungrily in the shadows waiting to use their teeth.<\/p>\n